Dreaming of Home

 
For the last couple of years I have had a recurring dream. I live in a house that I love- it's always different and never actually my real house- but I'm having some sort of decorating/space dilemma when I suddenly remember I have this entire wing of the house that I had forgotten I even had. It's usually down some stairs and is multi-level and open space and full of furniture and household goods that I have also somehow managed to forget I have and I get so excited because I have all of these options and all of my space issues will be solved and now I don't have to give up the house I love because I can make it everything I need. 

Well, I had no idea where this dream was coming from until last August when Emma went back to school and took all of her worldly possessions with her, leaving me with a new space to decorate. I quickly realized it made me feel the same way the dream did, especially when I furnished the room with items I had tucked here and there only buying a can of paint for my project.

I had the same experience yet again, when we moved our dining table to the front part of our family room and dragged a couple of cozy chairs to the dining room which happens to house our only fireplace and which we've never gotten to use to it's full potential.

We've been talking about doing this for several months, knowing that the winter months were likely to be difficult, and really wanting to root ourselves in home and to make the very best of the situation. We never got past the idea of dragging cozy chairs in here but as soon as we did that I got that dreamy excited feeling and I started walking around the house pinching a nightstand from here, a lamp from there, a couple of throws, baskets, accessories...better grab that ottoman and that stack of new books! Before I knew it I had an entirely new room and the only thing I bought was an extension cord. The feeling was so much more satisfying than going out and buying all new things. 

This wasn't just a shift of furniture but a shift in perspective. This room calls to us. I have read more in the last month then I have in a long time. I plop into one of these chairs and instantly feel relaxed. I already know that I'm going to miss it this spring when the floor plan gets flip flopped again but what a wonderful thing it will be to look forward to next winter. It has me rethinking how we use our spaces and what that might mean for future renovations some of which I am sitting in this chair and planning for later in 2021- I hope.

I have been meaning to write this post for a month but you know what a month it has been. Right now I am sitting in the keeping room, fire roaring, chai latte beside me, Louis Armstrong serenading me while snow falls outside. I have a lovely view of it through the french doors and into the garden. It is everything I imagined it would be back in the spring when I pictured it covered in snow. It is the best spot in the house right now. I'm not the only one who thinks so. 

Sometimes dreams do come true. 

And Then the Rest

Where to even begin? April, May and the first part of June passed in a blur of obligations written in my planner. Some enjoyable, some not, most running together in my memory at this point. I am the type of girl who prefers a lot of white space on my calendar or I tend to feel overwhelmed.  We celebrated an anniversary (18), had a dance recital, orchestra concert, trip to Missouri, went to a play, enjoyed several dinners out, celebrated the graduation of our "adopted" daughter, celebrated Mother's Day, planted so many flowers, had our first official college visit at Butler University and lost a beloved member of our family, my sweet kitty boy, Tummy (Mr. Tumnus).

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. But really it was just life. Simple every day life- the good, the bad, the chaotic, the beautiful. Life looked a lot different last year than it does this year and I don't think I will complain about the current situation for a moment. Except for my beloved kitters who was my constant companion and the kitty love of my life.

Life with Clover has improved. I can't believe we are 6 months in. Hang on there puppy mommas! It does get better. She has calmed down considerably but of course still has a ways to go, she is after all, an 8 month old Golden Retriever,  but we have learned how to manage things pretty well. TG for the park in my backyard and the occasional day at puppy camp! I have now reclaimed Sacred Day although not quite in it's previous form. I will get there eventually.

I've been tweaking a few things around the house and am about to embark on The Life Changing Magic of Tidying up. I just crave simplicity. I even gave my yarn stash a good sort recently.  We ditched our cable and home phone this week which I thought was going to be stressful but ended up feeling like a relief. I've been reading a ton, thanks in large part to the Kindle my guy got me for Mother's Day. I have been anti E-reader forever but this allows me to easily read while knitting and makes for much easier night time reading. It's been a game changer for me. I still love the feel of a book in my hands, the smell of ink on paper and I will never stop buying real, hold in your hands and sniff, page flipping books, but I love checking books out from the library, electronically. It's like some kind of voodoo witchcraft. Don't ask me how it works. I actually had to call up there and have them walk me through it due to my lack of technological abilities. If you'd like, you can keep up with what I'm reading here.

I've been cooking a lot of simple, fresh meals. I've been doing weight watchers since the beginning of February and while it's a slow process for me, I've made progress and am down about 20 pounds. All the dog walking and puppy tug of war dance parties haven't hurt either. I'm not sure how much longer I will do it but every time I put on old clothes that haven't fit in years and they fit comfortably, I get a thrill and am filled with disbelief. And you know what? The last four months would have passed the same whether I was eating healthy or not. As a bonus, I have more energy and feel better than I have in years!

 Even though I have more energy than ever, it seems 24 hours still isn't enough time in a day to do all the things I would like to do. I dream of all the new things I want to learn and try or the old favorites that I don't have enough time to enjoy. I try to pack in as much as I can in a day but I could surely use more time for play and less time for the not nearly as fun things. This is not revolutionary, I imagine we all feel this way.

I'm sure there is more to tell but I'm drawing a blank. Here's to a summer full of goodness and adventure. Emma and I have plans to get in the car and drive with no plan of where we might end up. It was our favorite thing about last summer- Mommy, Emma adventures. I love that she has inherited my love of photography which will make it even more fun this year.

It always feels so nice to come back to this little corner and record the events of life. Thank you for coming by and always offering such lovely support. I truly come here to record our lives so that we can look back at it and remember. It's a gift to myself and my family but you lot are the icing on the cake! I hope you are well and if you feel like it, leave me a note telling me what's new with you.

Emma's Bathroom Renovation

While I would have been thrilled to renovate a bathroom that I actually use, before renovating one that I've never used, it seems our house had other plans for us. If you don't own an old house, you may be unaware that old houses are bossy and we were helpless to argue with a water leak that had her sharing our bathroom.

This was a total gut job. We took it to the studs and the floor joists. It was a complete loss. Here's a little before and after for you!

Before:

After:

What you can't see in the before picture above is the wood box built around a pipe sticking out into the room near the ceiling. It never ceases to amaze us the jack-assery, as we like to call it, we find around here. I was so proud of the great framing job my guy did so that we could drywall it.

Before:

After:

During:

After:

The beauty of a complete gut job is that you have a blank slate and from the ashes of that hot mess, a beautiful, fresh new bathroom was born.

We made a few changes shortly after moving in, taking down that wall cabinet, switching out the hardware, light fixture, vanity, faucet and mirror. By the way, that mirror has been in my family for as long as I can remember and hung in my great grandmother's bedroom when I was little and then hung in my bedroom when I was a teenager. Em was adamant that it not be replaced so it just got a fresh coat of paint.

This bathroom is a tiny 6x7 feet which somehow feels much larger now than it did before. It's actually a tough space to photograph and there are no windows so the only natural light comes from a window in the bedroom.

With such a neutral backdrop, I had fun introducing some color and personality into the space and I'm so happy with how it turned out. I'm looking forward to school starting back so I can sneak in here and pretend it's mine. I'm not kidding you when I say that it's the best bathroom in the house. Emma couldn't be happier with her new space. She even got new, towels, toiletries and organizing bins. I have lost track of the number of times she has told us that she loves it and has thanked us for doing this for her. While we didn't use top of the line finishes like we plan to do in our own bathroom renovation, we tried to use good materials that feel appropriate to the age of the house (c. 1900) and that we hoped would be timeless.

This project, like every other project in this house, took way longer and cost more than we thought it would. When will we learn? So far we have done every project in this house ourselves. I think chances are good that we aren't tackling the two remaining bathrooms or the kitchen. It's not as easy as they make it look on HGTV folks. Also, for the record, let me make it clear that almost every time I say we in this post I really mean he. Aside from the drywall, my sweet man did everything. He demo'd, framed, replaced the subfloor, did the plumbing and electrical, installed the shower, toilet and vanity, did all the trim work and probably a dozen other things I can't think of. I was only responsible for design choices, clean up and painting. Well, I was also responsible for tiling but after a major tile fail, we hired that out too. I really, really wanted to be able to do it. I watched a ton of videos, read how to articles, did two dry runs but it turns out that I'm a much better baker than tiler. That's okay. I can't be good at everything and I'm starting to learn to acknowledge my limits.

I'm so proud of my guy and all of his hard work. I love that we have spent the last 5 years working together to make this house our perfect home, and with each new completed project, I fall a little more in love.
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Just a Little Patience

Yesterday was kind of a big deal in the Kershner house. We finally ordered a new sectional. After years of wishing and dreaming, our sofa and loveseat was officially worn out enough to need replacing. 

I have been saving pictures of white slipcovered furniture for at least 15 years. It's been one of a handful of things that remains constant in my decorating taste. I wish I hadn't let fear stop me from getting it when we got our last sofa. About 5 years ago I had a slipcover made for this chair and with 2 kids, 3 cats and 1 dog, I've never regretted it.

After a couple of years of research that took us to Pottery Barn, Ikea, Crate and Barrel, Arhaus and local furniture stores, we decided to go with this one from Ballard Designs.

So now that all the sitting, searching and choosing is done, I of course want it like yesterday. Or sooner. It won't get here until the end of July so I'm going to have to practice extreme patience and try my hardest not to wish the next two months away. Also? I call the corner.

Dirty Little Secret

I hate to start a post off with ugly, so I thought I'd open this post with a picture that is inspiring some of the changes in our kitchen.


Sometimes Bloggers present themselves in a manner that make readers think their lives are perfect. I hope you never feel that way here. I love my life, but it's far from perfect. My house is often messier than I'd like. My children are often sassier than I'd like. My husband is often lazier than I'd like (although to be fair, for the last couple of weeks, he's been on fire!). My budget is always lower than I'd like.

In an effort to prove my less than perfect existence, I'm sharing pictures of my kitchen with you. I even made them extra big so you can appreciate them that much more. The quality is crap, but who cares really? I'm challenged to find anything I like about this room. My Momma always said, If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Well. So. Hmm. I'm glad to have a working dishwasher? Those corks are a nice touch? How 'bout that tile work? I'm so glad there is more of it in the MASTER BATHROOM?

Saturday morning I woke up thinking it was a normal day. Then I walked into the kitchen and thought, I.just.can't.take.it.any.more. Then I was all like, Hey Sweetie. I think we should demo the kitchen today. Since we were headed out the door to visit friends for the day, we were rendered helpless to do anything about it. Until the evening.

The picture above is an in progress shot. Still an ugly duckling but she is starting to show some potential. The upper cabinets are all coming down. The same horizontal planking we used in the Studio closet makeover  will be installed and we will add two rows of open shelving. We have little budget, a bit of a plan and very little common sense. Sometimes you just have to dive in before you can think better of it (something my Hubby has been promoting for this project for awhile). This ridiculous way of doing things has some how paid off for us several times over the last couple of years, which is really just encouraging us when perhaps it shouldn't.

Since we can't create our dream kitchen right now, we are in the process of just trying to make it livable, make it so that I don't break down in tears every time I'm in there. Kidding. A little.

I'm still undecided as to how to handle the 50 year old texture spray painted, cabinets. Sand, scrape, paint and new hardware? Skirt them and pretend they don't exist? I don't use any of the cabinets. They gross me out. My Suburban, new house owning friends get this. My Village, old house owning friends don't. I use one drawer for silverware which I have bleached, scrubbed and lined. I'm a special kind of crazy. I get it.

The first 1 and the last 3 pictures are from my Pinterest boards and are some of what's inspiring our mini makeover. I'll be back very soon with one of the only things I do like about my kitchen and a recipe that you will hate me for.

A Laundry State of Mind

My man is so lucky! I've picked out his next project. I spent the past weekend buttering him up real good. Now there is no way he can deny me.

It's good to know your power and how to use it. Also, the truth is he likes doing projects like this.

Or at least that's what I tell myself. And him too.

I'm envisioning beadboard, open shelving, a folding surface, vintage accessories, lots of storage, a fabric skirt and a new tile floor. Although I think I'm going to tackle that myself, the first of many tiling projects I hope to take on in this house.

I'm taking some time to get inspired before we hit Lowe's for the materials and get started.

 It's such a tiny space in our home but it is truly hideous and you are faced with it as soon as you get to the top of our stairs. It's wide open for the world to see. And believe me, it shouldn't be. At least, not in it's current state.

(all photos from my pinterest boards)

That alone makes it a top priority. I'm sure my Sweetie will agree. After all we've been down this road before. Plus he's gotten good practice with this space and his skills are dramatically improving with each new project. Why, I think he's practically an expert by now. Yes, that is indeed the sound of me shamelessly sucking up.